


it's brighter now

by bodytoflame



Series: fragile heart [8]
Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types
Genre: Defining the Relationship, Developing Relationship, Established Relationship, F/F, Female Percy Jackson, Genderbending, Kinda, talking about how BAD they had it for each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:48:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24730315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bodytoflame/pseuds/bodytoflame
Summary: fem! percabethpercy won’t stop holding her hand.
Relationships: Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson
Series: fragile heart [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1553368
Comments: 2
Kudos: 93





	it's brighter now

**Author's Note:**

> it's my birthday and i get to choose the self-indulgent fanfic

**i don't wanna look at anything else now that i saw you**

**i don't wanna think of anything else now that i thought of you**

**daylight ..//.. taylor swift**

* * *

Percy won’t stop holding her hand.

It’s still summer, and her palms are a sweaty mess, but Percy’s still holding her hand through camp, every chance she gets.

Annabeth loves it. Loves that she gets to walk around with Percy’s fingers entwined in her own, without thinking twice. The breeze flows through her hair — it's a crisp August night — but the only sensation she can pay attention to is the connection between them; palms together, arms tangled up. She still has no clue how to act around Percy — the dynamic between them completely shifted in the new light of their relationship — but _this_ , this feels natural; her hand finds Percy’s without even thinking.

They don’t talk about it much. Instead, they spend every minute they can of each day with their hands linked; sometimes a still-awkward meeting of lips stolen in silence. She clings to Percy’s side with a newfound dependency — something she’d be embarrassed of if it didn’t give her such a thrill. Even though she knows she’s strong enough to face the world herself, there’s something oddly comforting in being protected by the girl who saved Olympus. Almost as if she could keep her safe from the gods themselves.

She feels like a child (and maybe she still is) trying to navigate this; new, and unexpectedly confusing, since it’s _Percy_ — who was once so innately familiar — now such a new concept quite literally at her fingertips. Annabeth stops, pulling Percy back when she continues walking, turning to face the lake together. This place is… calm. It always has been. She knows, especially so, for Percy. And calm is good.

Percy’s the first to speak. “You know, last time we were here I wanted to kiss you so bad.”

“I wish you had,” she says, “I wouldn’t have had to sulk over you for a year.”

“I thought you didn’t know—?”

Annabeth laughs, leaning her head against Percy’s shoulder. “I’m a smart girl, Percy. I would’ve figured it out.”

She is — smart, that is — and it makes her wonder how she could’ve been so ignorant for so long. That it was not only to protect her friendship, and Percy’s feelings, but also for herself. Her pride. Because that’s hard to admit to herself, still. She thought she’d figured herself out by her seventeenth year. To feel something so different, so new, throws her _so far_ off track.

And Percy is someone she trusts without hesitation; she doesn’t have to think twice about how her hand fits into hers, and so gently. More than _herself_ , she admits. Annabeth would reach for her hand before trying to save herself — not because she doubts her own strength, but because she believes in Percy’s. She believes in her loyalty; her mind; her heart.

So she’s not sure why they’ve been sneaking around like they’re some sort of clandestine secret. They were both sure Clarisse would have told someone by now, after all, it’s been two weeks. _They_ haven’t told anyone either. Of course, Grover probably knows, what with the whole empathy link deal (and Percy had mentioned he'd been goading her about it for years). But… even _Sally_ doesn’t know yet; and Percy tells her _everything_. Annabeth wonders if she’s worried about what she’ll say, or just dreading the inevitable onslaught of questions. It’s not to say people haven’t noticed them, holding hands all around camp. And she’s not sure if they’re too intimidated by both of them to say anything, or actually unaware it’s evolved into something more.

Some part of her just wants to just kiss her in the light of the campfire, and say _fuck it_. But it’s hard to know that other people knew her feelings for Percy, when even she didn’t know herself. Like, somehow her opinions are invalid, because she wasn’t smart enough to see the feelings hurtling towards her like a damn freight train. After all, how could she be a competent leader if she couldn’t even deal with her own problems? It’s hard to get over without internalizing it so completely that she genuinely feels wrong for even thinking it in the first place.

Percy’s arm wraps around her waist; Annabeth turns to look at her, shaken out of her spiraling thoughts — and she laughs, remembering the words that sent her there in the first place. “You can, you know that, right?”

“What?”

Annabeth answers, quiet. “You can kiss me.”

Percy chuckles, and she does. Quickly, right on the corner of her lips, but long enough that Annabeth can melt into her embrace.

When her heart's stopped pounding in her chest, Annabeth takes a step forward, pulling Percy with her, towards the dock. “Come sit.”

She follows, and they kick off their sandals, legs dangling off the edge of the dock and into the water, taking in the last minutes of the sunset, warm oranges and purples melting into deep, burnt reds and desaturated blues.

“We have to tell people eventually.”

“I know.” Percy leans against her, slouching; her hand finding Annabeth’s once again by her side. “It’s awkward though,” she adds.

“Percy, _I like you_ , I’m not afraid to admit that.” _Not anymore._

“I mean… I don’t know,” Percy sighs, “It’s not that, it’s… _I don’t want things to change_.”

“Practically everyone here adores you.”

Percy’s head tilts up towards her, a cheeky grin on her face, “Aw, practically? You trying to tell me you don’t?”

Annabeth chuckles, nudging her, “Jerk. I’m serious.”

“So am I.” The smile falls from her face. But it’s hard to put into words. There’s a feeling deep in the pit of her stomach that feels foreboding and bad, though she can’t pinpoint why, or what it is.

“As fun as it is sneaking around — and I don’t even know if they’re completely fooled — I want our friends to know.”

“I like you. You know that; I _really_ like you.” She’s such a clingy girlfriend. But, wow, _she’s her girlfriend._ She sighs, “It’s stupid.” Before Annabeth can chime in, she continues, “No, really, it is. I… don’t want anyone to treat you differently. And that’s dumb because, well, you pretty much saved all of their lives at _least_ once and there’s no way they’d ever _not_ be grateful for that, plus, like, we’re _demigods_ , so who even cares if we—”

“Hey,” she raises her eyebrows, “Different… isn't exactly a bad thing. If it'll make the boys stop trying to flirt with me…”

“…I’d be _quite_ grateful.”

She scoffs, and shoves Percy, inadvertently a little too hard, sending her tumbling into the water. It's not enough warning for her to deflect any of it; she surfaces a second later spitting out water and pushing her wet bangs out of her eyes. She doesn't even bother with drying herself, since before Annabeth can react, Percy's pulling her in by her foot, and sending herself into a fit of giggles.

“This is not a fair fight,” she remarks, pulling her barely-saturated curls into a lumpy bun on the top of her head, a quick dip not enough to soak her hair, but enough to be _incredibly_ annoying.

Percy manages a response as her laughter subsides, “You should've thought of that when you decided to push a daughter of the _god of the sea_ into the _water_!”

“I didn’t mean to!” Annabeth laughs, blushing furiously.

Treading water, Percy swims closer, flicking droplets of water into her face with a mischievous smile. “I still deserve a bit of revenge though, don’t I?”

Annabeth lets out a frustrated sigh, mainly towards herself for finding it so endearing. She can feel her clothes getting stiffer in the water, rough against her body as she treads. But still — Percy’s right here in front of her, with that charming grin. Against her better judgment, Annabeth seeks out these moments; moments she used to find annoying; or at the least, frustrating. It’s nice to see her smiling; the levity in her laugh making everything feel so much more normal. For a second, she can almost forget they’ve saved each other’s lives far too many times to count.

Her hands seek out Percy’s face with outstretched arms, bridging the last few feet between them, and kisses her. The lake is fresh, but somehow Annabeth can still taste the sea on her lips. She pulls back, hands still bracing Percy’s cheeks, letting a teasing smile grace her lips, “You’re _infuriating_.”

“Yeah?”

Annabeth pulls herself back up onto the dock, helping Percy up with a hand. “Yeah.”

She tries, desperately, not to focus on the way her camp shirt sticks to her body, suppressing a laugh when she sees Percy’s eyes dart away in the same way.

Percy doesn’t fix her hair or her clothes. Instead, she lays back on the dock without another word, staring up as the first stars start to appear in the sky, the mugginess of a lukewarm night setting in. Annabeth follows; it doesn’t help a bit. Her shorts are heavy, her shirt feels like it’s cemented to her body, and the air is murky. It’ll take all night to get dry, if at all. She stays anyways.

“What if we _don’t_ tell anyone?” she asks.

Percy turns her head. “What do you mean?”

“Nothing has to change… we can just _be_ a couple without announcing it.”

“I… yeah, I guess we can?” She hadn’t thought of it like that. It’s immensely appealing, much better than any other way she’d considered.

“Good,” she says, “I don’t want to be a big deal.” _I’ve had enough of that the past five years._

She takes Annabeth’s hand again, against the worn, splintering wood of the dock. “Me either, _gods_. I mean, at all. Not just with—”

“I feel the same way. I just want to be… _invisible_ for once.” She catches the irony before Percy can point it out, “And — don’t you dare. You know what I mean.”

“I do,” Percy admits. “You know I actually had a crush on you for years?”

She squeezes Percy’s hand, letting the action speak for her.

“That night in the rain. You asked me when I knew.”

“Yeah?”

“ _Yeah_ , and I _kinda_ gave you a half-assed answer,” Percy laughs.

Annabeth chuckles in response, rolling onto her side to face her, and listens intently.

“There was this girl from school — middle school — and… I mean we never talked, not really, but that’s when I started wondering…” As much peace as she’s made with the fact herself, it’s a million times harder to explain it to Annabeth. “And then it was another two quests, and I just… let myself forget, or… whatever.” She trails off, sighing. No, she never really _forgot_. But staying alive was more precedent; so it took a backseat in her mind’s list of important things. (Numbers one through one-hundred: don’t die. Number one-hundred and one: Deal with the fact that you’re in love with your best friend.) “Then there was Rachel, and she was always flirting, but I didn’t know if… if that was something I wanted too, or just…” She pauses. “I _still_ don’t know if it was.” Rachel was a great friend; fun to be around — she still is. But Percy isn’t sure if she just wasn’t into her that way, or if her feelings for Annabeth were _that_ overpowering. She figures she’ll have to be okay with never knowing. “And then there was Mount St. Helens, and — that’s when I knew. That’s when I _really_ knew. But even before, I—”

“You don’t have to explain it, Percy. It doesn’t matter about all that. Not now.”

“But it _does_.” She doesn’t justify why. There’s no concrete reason in her mind, just that… it does, somehow — it’s a part of her.

Annabeth sits up, and pulls her up by the hand. “I was so dense that I thought you couldn’t possibly like me, because I would’ve noticed it; because I kissed you, and you never said anything about it.”

“I didn’t know what it meant.”

“Neither did I,” she admits.

“You mean…” It really was a heat of the moment thing.

“I didn’t… not for a long time. There were so many things that didn’t make sense. They do now.” She shrugs, like it isn’t a problem. “Don’t get stuck on that.”

“I’m trying not to.” In the silence, she sees Annabeth fiddle with the hem of her shirt, trying to unstick it from her skin. She dries them both off without a word.

“Thanks. That was getting—”

Percy breaks into a smile. “—Kind of gross. I was trying to live in the moment, but…”

Annabeth laughs, agreeing. “We should get back before the harpies try to turn us into their dinner.”

“Good idea.”

She walks Annabeth back to the Athena cabin in silence, still not letting go of her hand. Percy stands awkwardly in front of her, fiddling with her hands, as they reach the door. “‘Night,” she says, sheepish.

Annabeth grabs her by the shoulders, and kisses her square on the lips, disappearing behind the door to cabin six with a quiet “Goodnight, Percy,” and an amused shake of her head.

Percy’s eyes dart around; there’s no one she knows very well, but come morning, she knows everyone will have heard. She blushes all the way back to her cabin, hands smug in her pockets.


End file.
